There are many roads in life, and the best one isn't always the one that you think of first. This sentence by writer Srđan Valjarević has recently occurred to me when I saw at a bookstore that a new edition of his first novel List Na Korici Hleba (A Leaf on a Crust of Bread) had been published by Laguna.
Of all the roads in life, Valjarević has chosen the one which does not imply that he would publish one book a year, be in the public eye 24/7, and have an opinion on everything and anything… On the contrary.
He lives a private life, and his last novel came out a decade and a half ago. Despite this, the readership here has not forgotten him and is happy to go back to his now cult works – Komo (Como), Dnevnik Druge Zime (The Diary of the Second Winter). Džo Frejzer and 49 Pesama (Joe Frazer and 49 Poems)…
In anticipation of his new novel, I spoke with Valjarević about writing and reading, fame and all it brings, the fear of being forgotten, the long walks through Belgrade, and (the troubled) state of affairs in the world…
Last year, you book Fric i Dobrila (Fritz and Dobrila) came out – a collection of the columns you write for the Nedeljnik weekly. Moreover, a new edition of your first novel - List Na Korici Hleba - has just been published. Is a new novel, which you have announced, on the way? How hard is it, after the success that the novel Komo had 15 years ago, to publish a new novel? Is the previous success a burden?
"The new novel will come out next year, it's finished. Fifteen years is a long period, I've actually forgotten about Komo. I feel no burden except for the fact that I burden myself with silly things, and no pressure other than the one I put on myself. Hypertensive thoughts. The hypertensive every-day life. It is strange, but it's the truth – you write to relieve the burden, but then, when you publish it, it becomes a burden. It brings you into awkward situations. But I stay away from explaining what it is that I'm writing, I cannot bear that. As soon as I finish something, I have to move on immediately."
You are lucky that your books remain popular, but were you perhaps afraid that people might have forgotten you a bit because of the long break that you've had in between novels?
"I haven't thought about it, but to be forgotten by people – that is an excellent position. You think more freely, no one bothers you, you do your job, write for yourself or for anyone, if you're publishing what you write. And when you put yourself a couple of times in situations in life in which you start from scratch, you also gain a sort of experience, which is wonderful. As Meister Eckhart says, ' And suddenly you know: It's time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings.' "
How do you feel about the fact that you are one of the most widely-read writers in the region – some people say that you have your own "readership sect" – and do you like having the title of the "cult author of the middle generation"? For example, Miljenko Jergović, also a big name in the regional literary scene, has said that you are "one of the most important ones in our ex-Yugoslavian generation".
"It isn't something that I can think about. You face both pleasant and unpleasant things when you do something, as is the case in life in general. Understanding or misunderstanding. But I have no need for someone to understand me, and I'm not after it. I need to enjoy what I do. The fact that I have been given an opportunity to think and to work, that is the only joy. I respect Jergović very much, as well as some other writers, and of course that there is nothing unpleasant in any of it."
Who do you like to read?
"There are many of them. I'm too lazy to start listing them. It's similar to seasons – the names keep changing, and there's always something new, but there's always a lot of the same."
How do you manage to stay away from the general public and the media. You are not inclined to social media either?
"The media. The trouble with appearing in public. The most trying thing related to publishing books. As for social media, I have no dilemma there: however much the internet might be the most miraculous thing ever, social media might be the stupidest."
Do you still go for long walks in the city during which you get ideas for writing books and columns?
"Yes, I still do. All the time. Sometimes I follow the Danube and leave the city behind. I walk, drink water, and smoke. I also type things into my phone. I have an app called Notes, so I use it to type things in, so as not to forget. Especially when I'm sure there's no chance I'm forgetting something. But thinking by writing is also a pleasant state of mind. I forget about my legs and get a feeling I could reach the sea."
In addition to Kalemegdan, why do you find cemeteries the most beautiful places to take walks in?
"What I actually said was that they are the best-arranged spaces in the city. That is what I meant. Cemeteries are the only places that are well-kept and peaceful. Kalemegdan I like, I've known it all my life. When my grandma and grandpa moved to Belgrade before World War II, they found a place near Kalemegdan. So, first my grandpa would take me for walks around Kalemegdan, and then I took him for walks until his death. So, I know Kalemegdan well. I go there often, especially early in the morning, although I don't live near-by. I visit both the lower and upper sections, and look at the Danube and the Sava.
"And I'm sure that, ever since I got to know it, Kalemegdan is at its most arranged in recent years. It's true there's a daft area there – some sort of a park with dinosaurs that make sounds as if they're farting or snoring. The need to contribute to something that already has everything it needs is strange. It's the same as the idea about a cable car. There's no need, it's dumb. There are centuries-old steps, and they're in a good condition. And if they're not, they can be repaired, and then you can climb up from the Lower City that way. That's enough."
"I have no dilemma that life is unbearable, I really think so," you said once. Why is life unbearable?
"If it were bearable, who would create anything? And what for? Science? They wouldn't have gotten much further than the wheel. Perhaps there would still be troubadours around, singing to women about little birds, which women see just like the troubadours, but perhaps also differently. And everyone would enjoy how boring everything is together. It's unbearable because human beings are unbearable. And all you do in life is making it more bearable."
What has the world learnt from the coronavirus pandemic, which at one point changed our lives, habits, even priorities, significantly?
"Nothing new, it only remined us of some things. Of the illusion that trouble unites people. That the irrational is more powerful than the rational. That panic and hysterics are inborn but profitable conditions. That all those questions along the lines of 'Who knows what's in the vaccine?' mean the same as the resistance to washing your hands in the 19th century, which was a small revolution at hospitals. And that all that nonsense about how 'the world won't be the same after this' means one thing only – it will."
We thought that we could take a breather when the pandemic calmed down, but the world is now facing a crisis caused by the conflict between Russia and Ukraine. Pessimists claim that we are at the threshold of World War III. What is you take on all of this? Is there any hope for this world?
"We'll always be at the threshold of World War III. Divisions are a big problem. Globally, but here as well. How can someone identify with an aggressor and violence, but they whine and whimper about always being a victim of something bigger than themselves? That is a phase which a person reaches in an illness called psychosis. The effects of a defeat in life bring every one of us into a state of mind where we keep delaying a change in life. So, there is hope. But first I need to believe that I have the power to change my life."
Message to oneself
'It's OK, it's been exciting'
What would today's Valjarević say to the 20-year-old Valjarević, who worked as a waiter on Korčula in the summer and as a millwright at a Belgrade repair shop during the rest of the year?
"You're in for hundreds of regrets, and hundreds of wrong choices and decisions, and hundreds of days feeling guilty, and hundreds of small joys. Keep doing what you started doing, and stay away from conventions, always and forever. Be persistent, and you will feel calm and satisfied more and more often, so perhaps one day you will look back and say, 'It's OK, it's been exciting.' "
(Kurir.rs / Boban Karović)
